This blog is about trying. As a recovering perfectionist, I am tired. In general. I can’t even begin to approach perfection, and I am sick and tired of not feeling “good enough.” So I’ve decided to travel down a path of
Trying anything on your own is a daunting feeling. Especially if you feel totally out of your element and completely unsupported. I also believe that women were not created to raise children all alone. We need the help of a
Failure is such a powerful concept. Many of us have grown up fearing this above all else. It is crucial to take the power away from this idea. “I have not failed, I have just found 10,000 ways that don’t
Who/what I was: A raging perfectionist. A workaholic. Stressed, anxious, sick all the time. People pleaser. People fearer. Self hater. Then I had a baby. My perfectionism ramped up to the nth degree (sorry, former math teacher too) and was
I hope you can find something here that is useful to you. (Like the dog in the gif… but even better, yeah?). The blue bar above is everything I’m working on, while the pic links give you some background info. I truly look forward to connecting with you here or on the Watch Mom Try Facebook page as you try things out for yourself or suggest other things to try.
Written on December 18, 2013
When I was two months pregnant with my second child, I found out I was moving to Singapore. I was thrilled! I feel like birth in America is hyper-medicalized. The movie Ricki Lake made, The Business of Being Born, really helped open my eyes to how things got this way, and how things are in the rest of the world (the follow up documentaries are great too!). I was hoping Singapore would be less medicalized and more open to things like water birthing, not being attached to an IV immediately, forced to lay on your back, and so on. So yeah, I was excited.
I had my first few pre-natal appointments at home in the Chicago area, and all was well. My first pregnancy had been textbook, and this one was proceeding the same way (except for my SI Joint Pain). I had no worries about leaving the country at about 20 weeks along. There were lots of forums online for expats that gave recommendations on doctors and hospitals to choose, and in Singapore, all hospital costs are given up front. I figured I would just choose when I got out there, as the stress of moving and leaving friends and family made me just want to focus on the present.
And now I am here. I have been here less than a week at this point. I am anxious to make sure everything is fine with the baby (and find out the gender!) so I have spent a lot of time online researching hospitals, programs, doctors, recommendations, costs, etc. If interested, feel free to click here to check out the costs for giving birth in Singapore vaginally or via Caesarean. From all the reading, it appears there is one doctor at Thomson Medical Centre who is supportive of more natural methods for giving birth. I do not like the idea of depending on one guy. What if he is busy when I deliver??? Plus he must be busy if he is the only guy doing things more naturally. Then I found a program called EMMa at NUH (National University Hospital). They match you with a midwife, and the midwife and obstetrician work together. You give birth in the hospital, but have the benefit of midwifery as well, which helps tremendously if you want a natural birth.
I looked up the doctors at NUH and found E K Tan, who has a special interest in helping mothers deliver without medical interventions. I think he will be a good fit for what I am looking for in a delivery (and yes, I know I don’t get to choose how it all plays out). I will call him today and make an appointment. Hopefully I can get in soon! Figure out whether I have a boy or girl joining our family.
I think this will be perfect for me. I want to have the best of both worlds. I want to be able to move around, try the shower, whatever, to manage my pain, and see if maybe I can deliver without drugs. I had a terrible eczema reaction to my first child’s birth, and I think it had something to do with the drugs. I would also like to avoid an episiotomy or a tear if possible, and I know midwives are trained to help prevent this.
This week they have a program where you can learn more about the program and meet the midwives. I am looking forward to it!
So we are finally here (3 months). And unpacked. And nearly feeling totally settled in. I could do a little happy dance, but I am too tired so I will let this guy do it instead. –> Life is starting
I think they were able to smell my desperation. I was at a playground letting the todds play while I tried to gather my thoughts about what to do with my time out here in Singapore. There were a couple
August 2011. I met 2 ladies at a hospital group for new moms, and thought we could never be close. June 2012. I met two ladies at a park and immediately assumed they would not like me. I was sure
Originally written Dec. 7, 2013. So I totally botched my first chance to make a friend tonight. We’ve been in Singapore for 3 days now and are starting to feel a little at home. I’ve made a couple dinners, we’ve